Welcome to the Radiant Soul Sisters Podcast!
Episode #19
Today my guest is Amy Schmidt, Founder, Fearlessly Facing Fifty, Co-Founder, Better
Than Gossip
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If you want to read the transcript, check it out below:
Susan
Oh my goodness listeners you are in for a treat. Today I have my friend Amy Smith here. And Amy is an award winning podcaster, best selling author, public speaker, TEDx speaker, and founder of the brand, Fearlessly Facing Fifty, as well as co-founder of Better Than Gossip. Amy launched her business and brand six months before turning 50 years old. That is such a milestone in most of our lives, hitting 50. We realize maybe we love where we are, and we love what we’re doing, or maybe we need change. It just depends on who you are and where you are. But Amy has done a fabulous job of pivoting and reinventing her life and creating a life that she loves. Her mission is to encourage women over 40 to push fear to the side, there we go and find that hidden treasure of confidence that may have been pushed aside and not been allowed for them during their years of raising children or climbing the corporate ladder. Whatever it has been in your younger days. Amy is committed to challenging the narrative at midlife from crisis to opportunity. Amy, I am so glad you’re here today.
Amy
I’m so happy. And I just have to say I’m so proud of you. You’re doing an amazing job. And this is what we should be doing because there’s no one better at conversations than Susan Crews. So, I’m thrilled to be here.
Susan
Thank you. Thank you so much. Listeners, for your information. I did meet Amy socially during COVID, where I’ve met a lot of amazing people, mostly women, but a lot of amazing people and we connected socially. But I got to meet Amy in 2022, this year actually, she and another friend of mine, Kristen Coffield, co-founded Better Than Gossip. And so I actually went and recorded four shows for Huntsboro Hemp Company with them and they treated me like a queen in Connecticut. So it’s wonderful to have met Amy socially, but to also have gotten to spend time with her and to get to know her a little bit more. Amy, you know, one of the things I love to do is to really learn about people and have a great conversation into who they are or things that are important to them. And I always am curious about your childhood. What is something that you did in childhood, or a memory from childhood that you have?
Amy
Oh, boy oh, I love that question. Thank you, and thanks for having me. I really love that question. You know, I’m a Wisconsin girl. So born and raised and Green Bay Packer, you know, I mean, I’m just not so much Aaron Rodgers this season, but we won’t go there. Anyway, there’s still much season left. But anyway, I am the youngest of five. And a funny story that actually I write about in my book too, is it’s not so much a childhood memory. But it is a memory that is implanted in my heart because it was told at my wedding it was, it’s told everywhere this story. So you may have heard it. But anyway, I am the youngest, my oldest sibling was 18 when I was born, she was going to college. And they were 18,17, 13, and 12, I think. And we lived in a very modest home in Green Bay, Wisconsin. And we had a screen porch, supposedly, I can’t remember but screen porch in the back. And whenever my parents called a meeting, it was something important. And they called a family meeting. And the four of them went out to the screen porch and my oldest sister said, “okay, before mom and dad get out here, I’m just going to tell you, I know exactly what this meeting is about, I’m getting a car. So as the oldest sibling, I’m getting my Volkswagen bug. I’m going to drive you all around. I’m going to do everything like I should as the oldest, most responsible kid, but that’s what this is about. So just be happy for me.” And so my mom and dad came out and we had a little dog and my mom was very petite back in the day like a size 6x. I mean, just a teeny, teeny little thing, tiny little thing. And she was standing there with my dad. And evidently she said, “well, our news,” and my sister said “don’t even go any further mom. I know. I know. I’m going to college and everything and it’s expensive, but I will drive. I will drive these kids everywhere. I’m so happy I’m getting a car.” And she said “well actually we’re expecting a little visitor.” And because pregnant wouldn’t even be a word that would come out of my parents mouth. Like it just wouldn’t, a little visitor. And sure enough, my sister was like, are you kidding me? And we laugh about it to this day because the little visitor was me, I happened on a ski trip, I was the unexpected fifth child of the Winland family. But it’s a story that really sticks with me. And it’s a fun one because I have a great relationship with my four siblings, even though there’s such a vast difference in age. And that story, I just I chuckle every time I think about it.
Susan
You know, Amy, the first time you’ve shared that with me, I got the great chuckle with you too. And it’s one of the connections that we have. Not for me personally. But my one of my best friends, Carrie Brennan, we were seniors in high school. 18 years old, when Carrie’s mom told her that she was expecting another child, number four, a little girl. And I never will forget when we would go shopping or different places, people would think that the baby, Katie was Carrie’s child. But they were just saying, you know, and anyway, it was so much fun and Katie and Carrie, the whole family, the same thing, the same type of dynamics, even though there’s years and difference they were able to create a true family.
Amy
Oh, I would probably have a lot in common with your friend. My sister tells a story about going to college to you know, she was going on spring break. And all her friends were like, you know, we were going to Florida. And she would be like, oh my gosh, we’re going to Florida for spring break. And of course, spring break trip was a big old station wagon with us in the car, me sitting on the hump. You know, whatever with my little, not even a car seat. My brother, one of my brothers had thrown up the whole way from Green Bay to Milwaukee to pick her up and on top of the cars, you know, the crib and the porta crib and all of that. And so they always thought too, she was my mom, or what the heck this wacky family. So we have a lot of things in common.
Susan
Yeah, but what a fun memory. Well, Amy, you have done some really cool things. You have lived in lots of different places. You’ve moved around. You moved your family to Germany. Correct, Germany? When they were at very impressionable years. So that was very hard. But then when you got into your 40’s and I get goosebumps as I’m saying this but right before you turned 50 you decided to launch this Fearlessly Facing Fifty. And you wrote a great book about it, Cannonball: Fearlessly Facing Midlife and Beyond. You know, what encouraged you or inspired you or caused you to make or to take this big leap of faith?
Amy
I love that. And you know, it’s funny because I think a lot of the listeners, this will resonate with. Because I do think as women we are constantly inventors, we are constantly mastering transition. A lot of times we don’t even realize it, we just take it for granted. And we move on to the next thing and don’t even realize the amazing thing that we had just done reinvented for transitioned. You know, I was at a point where we have moved 11 times and my husband is not in the military. We’re not witness protection. He actually works in pharma. But we, you know, we moved a lot and that’s been our cadence. We’ve never lived around family. We’ve always been supported by friends more than family as far as just proximity. And I think it was something that’s always been instilled in me is that I love, I’m very curious. I was a journalist, I love to learn about people. I feel that people are undervalued, they undervalue themselves in so many ways, and because they don’t share their stories. And it was really on my heart to do that. I lost my parents, both my parents while I lived in Germany. Which was very difficult, trying to get back to Milwaukee from Germany as a challenge. And I think one of the reasons I really cannonballed at this point was because a lot of my story to that point, I knew that I had certain gifts around interviewing people, I knew I had gifts around writing, and I wanted to transition those gifts and move it forward and learn and challenge myself in new ways.
As far as you know, launching my podcast right before I was 50. I knew it was my time because I was sitting in a quiet house because one was off to college and the other two were off to school and my husband travels on average two to three nights a week, our whole married life. But one day he was home and he yelled to me as the kids, you know, to the kids they were getting ready for school and he said, hey, hey mom, would you on your way home from you know, whatever, would you pick up my dry cleaning? And it was at that moment when I heard mom and yes, I’m so happy to be a mom and so blessed has to be a mom. But it was at that moment where it really hit me differently. And I thought, Where did Amy go? And I’m sure listeners, you know, women especially that will resonate, because you do through all of those transitions and reinvention sometimes lose sight of who you are, and what value you’re really adding. So, you know, I yeah, I think that that’s always goosebumps for me. And I feel that there’s so many that we – so many women that say, you know, I used to be that. I used to be good at that. But you know, I can’t do it anymore. So I pushed fear aside, I pushed procrastination and perfectionism, all that stuff that always haunts us, pushed it to the side and said, why not? If not now, when? And if not who, why not me? I mean, you know, if not me who. So I did it. And I launched the podcast not knowing a thing about it. I was the books on tape girl.
I wrote a book that all started because when my dad passed away, I didn’t make it back in time for him, for my mom, either. They weren’t conscious when I got back. And I remember being in this hospital room with my dad, and all of my siblings and their spouses there. And I was there alone, because Tim had to stay back in Germany with the kids. And I was standing there and I had what I would think classify it as a panic attack, which I’d never had before. And I had to excuse myself from the hospital room and just kind of crouched down in the, in this cold hospital floor at the lights beaming at me and just was sobbing and shaking. And my brother came out one of my brothers and just said, Amy. Dad knows you’re here first of all, that’s most important. And he knows how much you’ve done and how you know how proud he is of you. But write the damn book you’ve always wanted to write. Tell those stories, because that is going to inspire people. And that’s what you’re meant to do. So in a long winded way of saying it, that’s really why I started. Really, why I started, it was heartfelt. It was time for me to do it.
Susan
Absolutely. And you know, I get cold chills there several times in the story that I have gotten goosebumps. And I was 48 when I had the pivotal moment or the big aha, same thing where where Susan, you know, our youngest was at college, and everything was going well. And we took our youngest to college and came back and Jimmy went off to work on the farm, and was happy and doing everything he loved. And I kind of looked around and I’m like, well, where’s Susan? And I’m like, I’ve got to figure this out. I’ve got to start moving forward. Or either, I’m going to be stuck just and please, women who stay at home work very hard. I am not saying that. But I just knew for me at 48 into 50 and beyond that staying at home playing tennis every day, playing Bunco, all those things wasn’t what I wanted. Like you, I felt like I had a story to share and things to do. Things left to do so I love that. And I love how you did push procrastination, perfectionism, fear, all those things aside.
Well, Amy, you know, you mentioned that Tim, your husband travels on average two to three nights a week, sometimes more. And you have three children. And you were a journalist at one time. And then as you started Fearlessly Facing Fifty, what did you do to really keep some work life balance in there, I call it harmony. I think when we oftentimes when we have balanced 50/50 You’re sort of standing on that fence right? When you have harmony, you know, our lives are like this beautiful symphony. Sometimes we’re playing all the instruments beautifully, and it sounds gorgeous. But other times you’re playing one instrument louder or you’re out of tune but it’s only for a measure. So what are some things that you’ve done to keep that harmony?
Amy
Yeah, I love the word harmony. You know, and I think that’s a constant battle too. Because as women, we are all things to so many people, right? We try to be there for everybody else’s needs. I can remember, I’ll start with the story just when I was writing my book, and I still had one at home, and he was old enough to drive to school. And, you know, he left one morning, I do a lot of work in the morning. I get up, I have a routine that I do. And I really start the day, you know, very early. And I was sitting there in my office writing this book because it was a commitment that I needed to get done. And he left you know, he grabbed whatever he needed for breakfast and when he came home after soccer practice, there I was still sitting and he looked at me and said, “Mom, have you seriously been sitting here all day?” And I said “I have and he said “mom get up, we are going for a walk, this is not you.” And so I have to check in with myself on several things. But as you get older, you get wiser. I think there is truth there. And you decide, especially for me boundaries. setting boundaries is a very important part of work life balance as an entrepreneur, as a solopreneur, you have to set boundaries, those boundaries are around self-care. You know, moving your body every day, it’s around, you know, starting your day, and how you’re engaging with people, there’s certain boundaries, I have to set around that, you know, responding to emails, or texts or whatever, in a certain amount of time. And really creating that space for you. You know, we have one life, we all know coming out of this pandemic, how precious it is. And we know how that can change in an absolute nanosecond. So taking care of yourself, and treating yourself as a guest of honor is something that I’ve really put as a priority on my list as I move forward. And I think that’s, we don’t do it enough. Somebody told me once you know, Amy, do you make yourself a priority? And I said, you know, I do make myself a priority. It’s not the top priority every day, but it always makes the priority list. And that’s what you have to keep in mind.
Susan
Oh, Amy, I love that treating yourself as the guest of honor.
Amy
Yeah. I mean, when you entertain people, and you have people in your house, how welcomed and loved and gracious and just you just fill them with this welcome. And then when you turn it around, and you see yourself walking up the stairs to your home, how are you treating yourself? And that’s a good check in. Because that’s what we need to do. We have to love ourselves.
Susan
You know, and I told somebody not long ago, we were talking and they said, you know, what is one of the things that you try to do every day? And I said, you know, first off, I try to love myself well, so I can love others better. Because it took me years to learn that yeah, that if I loved myself, well. I could love you better. Yeah. And you know, it’s sometimes a hard lesson to learn, right?
Amy
Susan Crews, write that down. That is one of your that needs to go with your legacy right there.
Susan
Yeah, actually, you know, the picture we took of us earlier, I’ve got a post it note on my screen that says love yourself well, so you can love others better. But, but you’re right, that really comes from my heart, and it resonates with what you were saying here. So Amy, you know, you talked a little bit about you have a morning routine. And you talked about being the guest of honor treating yourself like the guest of honor. Is there anything else that you do that helps illuminate that light within you to shine light into others?
Amy
Mhmm, great question. You know, I really surround myself with some pillars. Those people in my life that know me on my good days, my not so good days that have seen me through challenges. You know, there’s Jim Rohn, has said many, many times who are your five people? I’m about to launch a program about surround yourself with greatness and did you realize you’re surrounded by greatness. And when you look at your five people that surround you, you become the average of those five is and I really like his messaging. So you know, look at who surround you and surround yourself with greatness. And that’s so important. And that’s what really lights me up. I have, I’m very, very blessed to have wonderful family and wonderful friends and friends that are unexpected treasures. I think that’s another thing listeners today can really think about. And at times, it’s difficult for women to not so much walk out of a friendship or give up on a friendship. But sometimes we have to realize that, you know, friendships change, they evolve just as we do. And all of a sudden and unexpected treasure of someone you might have sat with on the airplane, and you shared a narrative and exchange stories, and all of a sudden, it’s a connection. And they’re adding value to you in a way. That’s an unexpected treasure. So look at those things and you know, deposit into your tank, don’t want to withdraw from it. So if there’s people around you that aren’t lining you up and filling you, it’s time to kind of, you know, allow that to transition.
Susan
Absolutely. Well, Amy, I know that you have written this book, and I would love for you to tell the listeners how they can find your book, Fearlessly Facing Fifty and how they can connect with you.
Amy
Oh, thank you. Yeah, so the books on Amazon. You can find it anywhere there. You can just Google Amy Schmidt. You can go to my website which is just being redone. I’m so excited. I have a young woman who does it for me and she’s so creative. So, I think it’s about ready to launch. You can go to fearlesslyfacingfifty.com. Fifty is spelled out. There’s an Instagram you can link. There’s a new Instagram that’s going to be cannonball, which it’s going to be Fearlessly Facing Fifty and I think cannonball. I don’t know, she put it together for me. So that’s a new one we’ll link that too. And the best way to connect with me and I really am honest about this, they can email me. Amy at FearlesslyFacingFifty.com I do get back to people. I do give myself, I set a boundary, I used to be 24 or 48, now I’m a week, I get back to people within a week. And just to give myself that gift of grace. So I always get back it’s just not immediate. But I love to just hear stories. And that’s the part of this journey and I think your journey, any woman’s journey, people need people. Connectivity and community is so important. And you know, when you have something on your heart to share, share it and share your story. That’s, that’s really what I love.
Susan
You know, and learning to share your story is so important because as you said, we need each other. And you and I might have the exact same experience or have felt the exact same way. But when I share the story, it might resonate with this woman. Right and you share the story, it might resonate with another woman we might be saying the exact same thing. You know, with the world of internet and social, there’s not a lot of newness out there.
Amy
Exactly.
Susan
But what there is, is each one of our individual unique stories, and you never know who needs to hear it to ignite that light within? Yes. Oh my gosh, if this episode has you thinking about how to put yourself first create a life you love and live on purpose. Be sure to connect with me on my socials at SusanCrewsCo. Or if you would like to chat, head to my website, Susan crews co.com. and schedule a time for us to connect. I have learned so much from you, Amy. I always learn so much from you. So thank you. Thank you so much for being here. One last question. If you had one tip that you could share with our viewers, our listeners today, what would be the one tip, the one piece of advice that you would share?
Amy
I would tell everybody listening today to create their greatness statements. To come up with three “I am” statements for themselves uniquely, uniquely you and write them down. Whether it’s I am beautiful, I’m confident, I am healthy. I am courageous. I’m curious. Whatever it is, you’re three, jot them down, stick them in your handbag, stick them in your nightstand, whatever and, and reflect on those every so often. Because we all need to realize how great we are. And that’s something that we push aside. So that would be my advice.
Susan
I absolutely love that. Thank you again for your time and your energy. I love connecting with you. And if you have enjoyed another episode of the Radiant Soul Sisters, be sure and tune in again next week. Also connect with Amy Schmidt and you can learn how to Cannonball and Fearlessly Face Fifty and beyond I can say. Till we meet again, I’m Susan Crews, your host and all the episodes, resources, and community are on the website SusanCrewsCo.com.
