Building a Radiant Relationship with Social Media with Molly Cahill

Have you found yourself battling a toxic relationship with Instagram? In today’s episode, social media marketer Molly Cahill joins us to highlight how we can overcome the comparison and negative mindsets we have with platforms like Instagram in order to build a radiant relationship with social media.

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Meet Molly:

Favorite Childhood Memory

Growing up in the south, lunch at her Nanny’s house in rural Alabama was one of her favorite memories. From the clothes she was wearing to the way she smelled, the memories still live on with Molly today.

Reframing Your Instagram Mindset

So many of us have a love/hate relationship with social media due to the walls others put up, the negativity, and the comparison we deal with. Molly loves talking about mindset work and overcoming the toxic relationships we have with social media.

Your intention comes through in every single thing you do—if you don’t feel good about doing something, it will show. You need to be authentic and aligned in who you are. Take a step back and figure out why you hate it.

Here are a few tips to help you reframe your mindset and overcome your toxic relationship with Instagram:

1. Unfollow or mute your colleagues—they’re often who you’re comparing yourself to.
2. Be careful in how you’re searching on socials—your explore page will reflect it. Look at other industries instead and get inspired by what they’re creating.

These tips will also improve your creativity as you won’t be fed the content that you think you need to create.

Comparison is the thief of joy.

It’s so easy to fall into the comparison trap when you’re online, especially when you’re constantly watching others in your industry. When you step out of that comparison trap, you’ll be more inspired, more creative, and happier with the content you are creating.

Social Media Isn’t Real Life

While it may feel like the people you’re following online have it all together, the reality is that no one does. Molly is a prime example of this, as she’s dubbed herself a master delegator in order to get everything done that needs to be done.

By handing off tasks and delegating to others, Molly is able to hone in on what she needs to get done. If you’re thinking about delegating, consider starting with your recurring tasks or the things that are never crossed off your to-do list. Another really powerful move is setting boundaries around your time and work.

Work/Life Harmony

We feel the need to be the martyr and if we’re not suffering, we’re not worthy. In every sample of life, we apply this idea yet it makes no sense. It doesn’t have to be heavy or hard—you can appreciate what you have and build a life with work/life harmony.

Connect with Molly:

mollycahill.com

instagram.com/mollyacahill

holisticmarketinghub.com/enroll

Review the Transcript:

Susan Crews
Are you ready to band The comparison thief from your Instagram? Well ladies clutch your pearls and listen up because Molly Cahill is dropping some real truth bombs about Instagram. Are you dreaming of having the time and energy to create a life you love? Is your calendar full of events? And you’re thinking, there’s no time for me? Do you look like you have it all together on the outside, but on the inside, you’re a hot mess. You’re frustrated and tired all the time. Susan Cruz shines the light on successful women in a few men who have busted the exhaustion cycle by prioritizing herself, released any guilt and have found inner peace while creating a life they love filled with harmony. Join Susan’s candid conversations to learn how these successful women illuminated their inner light to create a radiant life. Welcome to the radiant soul sisters. Oh boy, I am so excited about today’s episode of the radiant soul sisters, because I have my friend and a social media expert, Molly Cahill with me. Molly, welcome to the show.

Molly Cahill
Thank you, Susan. I’m so happy to see you. And we’ve just been like what chatting along here for like 20 minutes before we hit record getting caught up. Yeah,

Susan Crews
I didn’t realize Time flies when you have fun, right? Yeah, for sure. Well, listeners, I met Molly through Huntzberger hemp company, I was searching for someone to help us with Instagram. And I came across Molly K Hill and boy am I glad I did. Because when Molly and her team took over helping us build Instagram and connect there. It made all the difference in the world. Molly typically works with people in the health and wellness world. She works with Indies. She works with chiropractors, she’s works with coaches, and she works with anybody who is a health and wellness Pro. So if you’re struggling with Instagram, or social media, I can tell you Molly is your go to girl if you did. Oh, you’re welcome. You

Molly Cahill
made it easy. We loved working with you. And we just personally I loved the products too. So thank you that made it a lot easier to to be like Oh, cool. Yeah, I can totally get behind this because I’ve used it love me. So that’s bath bombs.

Susan Crews
Thank you those bath bombs are amazing, aren’t they? Well, Molly, I always start off the show. I like to connect with my guest and just learn a little bit more about them. Can you tell us one of your favorite childhood memories?

Molly Cahill
Yes. So I’ve lost a lot of my southern accent because I lived in California for so long. So my husband was military that we lived in the Florida Panhandle. Susan, you’ve still got the thick southern accent for the Southerners who are listening. I don’t know this might not be a southern thing. I think this kind of transcends all regions but lunch at my grandmother’s house. I called her nanny. It she lived out in the country and rural Alabama and I just remember I can remember the sound her screen door made opening it going is that funny like the little things that just kind of imprint. I can remember she was almost always in her teeny, teeny tiny little kitchen. And with her back to me I can remember always what she’d wearing and the smell of her house distinctly and she she always had something to say about the food she cooked it wasn’t good. Maybe did I do this? Right? It wasn’t salty enough or I didn’t like it. It was always delicious. So yeah, she was my best friend My daughter is actually now named after her and that’s by far my favorite childhood memory.

Susan Crews
I absolutely love that and I will tell you that if you were to talk with my four children, they would tell you that as one of their five favorite childhood memories you know living in the south we live on a farm and lunches especially Sunday lunch

Molly Cahill
is a big deal it is a big deal.

Susan Crews
Yes and so that that would be a favorite memory I can just see nanny standing there cooking and like you said the house and the sounds and all of that which is go rather four wheeler

Molly Cahill
we’d fit on the hay bales we’d I learned how to drive when I was wait way young way, way, way young drive driving their pasture and my grandfather’s truck and yeah, great,

Susan Crews
funny story, which then we’re gonna get into the meat of it. But this is so funny, man. My children also learn to drive very young. I think that is a farm life experience or a southern experience. So my oldest daughter was in eighth grade and she and her best friend, Mary Claire had learned how to drive one of the farm trucks that had a stick shift. That was a requirement. Well, our children drove tractors, so they knew. But anyway, they had learned how to drive this truck with a stick ship while the truck was in the shop and it was spring break was coming up. So here they go, driving my mother in law’s Lincoln Continental on the farm. They would leave her house and they would drive through the farm barn yard, and then they go out into the fields on the past. While my husband had told them, y’all it is farm season, you cannot go fast through the barnyard there people here working were moving tractors were doing this. Well, they went through, in his opinion, much too fast. And so they got grounded from driving for a week, while it was spring break week. And you would have thought those two girls had died. Because they were not allowed to drive over spring break. And they would get in these cars and trucks crank up the radio and go driving through Nick, can you imagine? 1314 years old? Yeah, I can’t imagine. Right? Yeah. Yeah, you can you can see it. You can you can feel the air blowing through the car, right? Yes. Crazy, pure

Molly Cahill
devastation of like, oh,

Susan Crews
yeah, they were like, What are we going to do with our time over spring break? And I’m like, Well, I guess you’re gonna figure something else out because dad will not go back on that roll. And anyway, so it was a great lesson to learn. But how fun Molly? Well, Molly, let’s, let’s get into talking a little bit about you and a little bit about social media and a little bit about life. And I’d like to start out because as I mentioned, you really helped me and taught me a lot about social media. And I believe I’ve said to you, Molly, you know, I have this love hate relationship with social media? Because there are so many times I think it’s fake. There also are times that I believe people struggle with comparison. Oh, yes. And if you haven’t been able to deal with that, you know, it can really send people down an emotional rabbit hole, right? Absolutely. You know, share with me, what what do you know? Or what do you hear about toxic relationships in social media? And how do we overcome them?

Molly Cahill
This is one of my absolute favorite things to talk about. Because one of the greatest barriers and people don’t want to talk about mindset work a lot, right? Like it’s not sexy. They’re like, let’s get straight to the hacks and the tips. It’s like for all the health coaches listening, it’s the people who are like, will tell me what supplement to take, yet they aren’t getting enough sleep, moving their body and getting sunshine, you know. So this, this part is what I almost always found, I was having to go back, like, I wanted to tell them the cool sexy, shiny tips, you know, and I’m like, oh, we gotta go back a few steps. Because as you know, your intention comes through and everything you do, and you’re doing something that feels it feels shitty for you to be on social media all the time, and you feel like it’s something you’re doing out of obligation. Right? How do you think that’s gonna come through to your audience like that? It permeates everything you do? Right? Just like when you don’t feel well, it permeates everything you do. So I like to kind of take people back a step and say, let’s, let’s let’s kind of peel open the onion and see why is it that you hate it? Now, what’s funny is, I specifically teach Instagram, as you know, right? Oddly enough, when we took over the Hunsberger hit page, your Facebook page actually saw more engagement than I thought. I thought that was really interesting. I personally don’t use Facebook anymore. I mean, I have one where I get on it as infrequently as possible, because I still find Facebook as the place that kind of brings me down. I think because it’s a lot of people who you’ve collected through life, right? Yeah. Whereas my Instagram really feels more intentionally curated. Does that make sense?

Susan Crews
Yeah, absolutely. In You know, I think also I’m hearing you say, you know, you got to be authentic and aligned. with who you are, right? Yes. And yes, in the right frame of mind when you’re posting, or putting the info out there.

Molly Cahill
Yeah. And what’s beautiful is it isn’t 2015 2016 Like, there was a heyday of Instagram where everyone’s feed was beautiful. And everyone was using the perfect Lightroom filters, and everything. And there’s still a lot of that today. But, you know, people can knock on Gen Z all they want. But one good thing they’ve taught us is an I don’t do tick tock, but like, their videos and their stuff are just so much less curated and perfect. You know, they go for quantity over quality, which is also can be an issue in different ways. But my point is, in 2023, it’s like you have permission, like, not only should you just say, Oh, it doesn’t have to be perfect. Like that’s a good, that’s just a good phrase for life. It’s like not even a trend anymore. How cool is that? Like? It’s the trend to not be? Oh, yeah, yeah. So one of my top tips that you could implement right away. And this is going to make a lot of people like clutch their pearls is like, unfollow your colleagues, or people who do the same or mute. You don’t have to unfollow them. There’s a mute button. If you go to your profile, or go to their profile. There’s a little rectangle following button, you can tap that and you should see mute. Wow, I’m mute or unfollow almost everyone in the social media marketing industry, not because I don’t want to support them, right. Like, you know, me, we’ve worked together a long time. I love supporting other women, other people in business, right? It is about my own mental health that I have to protect first. And I can’t support you if I’m constantly feeling crappy, about the fact that I’m not putting out as much content as you are. Right? Perfect example is I have a friend who I love dearly. Her content is incredible. But she posts reels, almost daily. She’s up to over 100,000 followers now. Right? You know, like she’s kind of just been in, that’s just not, she’s a much smaller agency than I do. Right hidden agency, we run up to I think we’re up to 27 accounts now. Right. And so a lot of my energy gets put into other people’s content and not my own. And I’m working on this every day, I’m working on putting my own stuff first. But my point is, I had to mute her even though I love her dearly, right? For a couple reasons. One the comparison, right? Because I’m like, Ah, I’m not doing as much as her. And then two, I had to mute her. Because anytime she made a video or a post about something that I also taught, and this wasn’t just her this is for any social media marketer, right? Like, oh, I don’t have an original thought in my head, like, Who are these people hiring me when they could hire all these other people? Like, are they going to think I’m stealing their idea if I also post about this thing? And truly, the reality is, there is nothing unique on the internet. Except for you. You’re the only unique thing, right? Exactly like, yeah, there’s gonna be different social media managers who have different takes on how hashtags work, or how you should do this or that. But ultimately, a lot of it is the same advice, right? It’s just how you present it to your audience. So for those two main reasons, the comparison and it made me feel like am I stealing their idea? I don’t have a unique thought in my head, like what’s like, are they going to think I’m copying them when I think this thing too, I just had to mute. It’s not about not supporting other women or colleagues, I just want to be in control of when I consume their content, versus it being fed to me. And another tip for that is like, if you’re a life coach, you know, I wouldn’t be following all other life coaches, because you’re just gonna be like, Oh, they’re doing more than me or whatever. Right? So when there is a big change, so for example, when there is a big Instagram change, and I want to go research and see what other people are saying about it, all of a sudden, my Explore page because the algorithm learns super quickly. Yeah. Oh, my Explore page is full of social media tips again, and I’m like, dang it, and then I can’t help myself. It’s like I have to go click on it right. So what I do then is again, algorithm learns quickly, I started going to search something else. Like for example, we’ve never had a really big garden so I’m like, I’m gonna go search gardening tips for where I live my zone in Ohio. I’m gonna search to that idea. Yeah. I want my Explore page to be joyful and not a place of and you know, another byproduct of all of this Susan is it makes you so much more creative and I like that a lot. Yes. Because if you’re only seeing the same things recycled and regurgitated, it’s gonna get you in this, this echo chamber not only of, you know, the way you perceive the world, but just of creativity. So I love like, it’s one of my favorite accounts to get real ideas from is a gal who flips furniture, like, Can I do social media, but like, she goes and buys like garage sale and thrift store for that up. And I’m like, Oh, that’s a great idea. That’s a great idea for real. So it’s, I love watching stuff from other industries, because it really sparks your creativity. So those are just some of my first tip out of the gate.

Susan Crews
I love that idea. When you know, that, that comparison is such a real thing. You know, we hear over and over again, Comparison is the thief of joy. Yes, it you know, that’s a quote in it, not my quote, a real quote, another quote, but but we hear that and we know it, right. But it is so easy to fall into that trap when you’re on Instagram, because we do see, see other people doing other things. And then like you said, I love that you brought up the fact that when you’re watching people in your industry, the majority of the time, you think, Oh, that was in my month plan to post or my programs coming out. And that’s one of the big things I work on. But is she going to think I’m posting this because of her or him, you know, and so I really liked that tip a lot to really go to other industries. And I know that when, when we were working together with Huntzberger him a lot of times you would send me I mean, it might have been a dog food or, you know, some real from like you said some completely different industry. But yet it could be relate to I could change it to have that style, but relate to my product or my mission or my statement. Right? So I really love that. Well, you know, I know I have watched you grow your business. I know that you have expanded, you have over 25 accounts that you all are that your team is serving. I know that you have added women to your team in the last year. Congratulations. So exciting. Thank you. I also know you have moved in your mom to a five year old a precious little one. Your wife in in you’ve got lots of other things. How do you do it all Molly?

Molly Cahill
Oh, I don’t that’s that’s the I had somebody messaged me, message me that the other day. She goes, I’ve never and we don’t know each other in real life. She’s so this is again, like a perfect social media. It’s not real life. She says, I’ve never seen anyone do more than I do. And you do. I’m like, Oh, honey, you have no idea. Like I watched three episodes of the ambassador on Netflix last night. Like I’m not really like somebody who is just like working 24/7 Yeah, I am a little bit of a busybody I don’t do it all. I am a master delegator. I feel like that is my number one strength in business.

Susan Crews
More women need that street. Yes, Master delegate us

Molly Cahill
love it. I when I started my business, and Susan, you could speak to this way more eloquently than I can just because you are a serial entrepreneur and you have way more experience and entrepreneurship than I do. But I knew so I went into my business on day one with the mindset of okay. The statistics say that most new businesses don’t aren’t profitable until until year three. Now, for some, they might see that as disheartening. They’re like, Oh, I looked at it as a permission slip. And now that doesn’t mean good. There are plenty of businesses who can make money year one, six months, whatever. I’m not saying it can’t be done, right. I just knew I wanted this was not going to be a hobby. I knew this was going to be my next career. So I was looking at it for the long haul. And I believed in myself and I knew that I could do it. So I went in with it. Like, okay, I’m going to be profitable by year three. And something about that just really shifted my mindset because I wasn’t afraid to invest in help when I couldn’t, quote afford it. You know what I’m saying? Like, my first VA, my first all those little things that, for example, starting an email list. I kept putting it off and putting it off and putting it off and I’m tech savvy, I could figure out how to do it. But I kept putting it off. And Susan, I hired a VA for $75 $75 who set it up for me. It’s just like, could have been done months ago. All

Susan Crews
right, right? Yeah.

Molly Cahill
I always say, no, no, this isn’t the question you asked. But a lot of people do ask me, How do I know where to delegate? Well, how do I know where to start? Look at the either, like the recurring tasks that you don’t necessarily have to be doing that my business coach now who’s really brilliant would say death by 1000. paper cuts like, well, it only takes me like two minutes. So I don’t mind. Well, that only takes me like two minutes. So it’s like, well, those two minutes add up. So start with those little things, or start with the things that you find keep getting added to your to do list and never crossed off.

Susan Crews
Exactly. I, I love that. And, you know, I think there’s one other thing that that I do know about, about you that, in addition to delegating, you are great at setting boundaries. And I really think that, you know, and I think the rest of your team knows that as well. You know, I’m not saying if there’s an SOS, or you know, something like that, that you don’t work outside of extra time, but in a no, not long ago, you were posting you were working over the weekend, you know, but that’s not your norm.

Molly Cahill
No, and I actually have my team to oh, that they’re way better at because they’re younger, right? They’re about 10 years younger than me. And they it was just never, it wasn’t even a spoken thing. It was just completely unspoken. I couldn’t reach them in the evenings or weekends. And I didn’t try and it just was like, Oh, okay. Right. You can do this too. And they know again, like, there’s been times when, like you said, there was an SOS literally, I, when you joined my program, was it called Master Graham, or was it called?

Susan Crews
No, what’s the whole estate hub?

Molly Cahill
Okay. Well, it used to be called Master gram. And we got a cease and desist letter from Facebook’s attorneys that I couldn’t use the word gram. Yeah, that was like, I’m using their cell phones. I’m so I’m like, we have 48 hours to change the name of this business.

Susan Crews
That’s right. You know, SOS is always come up, you know, but not regularly, not regularly. And, you know, Molly, my daughters are close to your age. And I will tell you that my daughters have really taught me a lot about those boundaries. Like one time, I was gonna respond to it. Huntzberger him email, like, at nine o’clock on a Friday night was with family and my daughter looked at me, she’s like, No, you’re not. Because there’s nothing you can do right now. And you’re saying you’re available. 24/7 When you send this email, and this is not an S O.

Molly Cahill
S. It creeped Ryan though, Susan, recently, I just told my husband, I was like, Oh, I’m doing it again. Jay would get home from school. She’d be you know, watching her iPad after school, having her decompression time, you know, and I’d get a laptop and I keep working in any little pocket of time. I felt like I had to be working. And I was like, no, there are no fires. Nothing’s gonna happen. Stop replying to your clients on the weekends. Like you’re just training them that that’s then they’re going to expect a response, right? I recently just turned my Gmail notifications off on the weekend. Nice. Because I can’t help it. Like if I see it come through, I can’t help it. Yep. And that’s another thing back to the social media thing. I have never never never had Instagram notifications turned on. They’ve been on for probably 30 years.

Susan Crews
Yeah, I don’t I don’t I the way I look at it is I am not that important. That I have to have Instagram notifications on Facebook notifications on LinkedIn. No, no, no, I don’t even have text message notifications on. And I do have my phone with me because I need to be able to be reached because of my parents. Right. So I do keep my phone with me, but I don’t have those notifications on either. Oh my gosh. Well, Molly, we haven’t even talked about it. You are the Instagram Expert. How can our listeners find you?

Molly Cahill
Yeah, so obviously Instagram is a great place to connect with me. I love chatting with people in my DMs. It’s one of my favorite hobbies. So I’m just at Molly AK Hill, C H, I ll you could just peruse what we do on my website as well. Molly cahill.com. And did you know I have a podcast now?

Susan Crews
Yes, I have actually listened to your podcast.

Molly Cahill
It’s pretty new. I’m about episode 18. And it’s called holistic marketing simplified. And it’s really great. Actually, I have a whole two part episode I did with my personal life and health coach on a day different side of the toxic issues with Instagram or just social media in general about like the trolls and the natural comments. She teaches a really cool subconscious modality to deal with that. So if you like Susan, then you would probably want to start with that episode. It’s with Chuck, my friend, Chelsea Haynes. I think those were like 11 and 12 or 10 and 11, something like that.

Susan Crews
Perfect. I’ll check it out and make sure that it’s in the show notes. Molly, I always enjoy our time together it It flies by I love being connected to you. I’m thankful that I found you right. via Instagram. And in I can tell you listeners, Molly and I are always sending each other’s people’s names. Yep. My new editor of the podcast is actually Molly’s editor as well. Yeah, hey, are you doing? Well, we love that. But anyway, Molly, in closing, if you just had one tip, or one suggestion, it can be about life. It can be about work life harmony, or it can be about Instagram, what is the one tip you would want to leave our listeners with today?

Molly Cahill
So I didn’t even know you’re gonna ask me this question. But I didn’t only have to think twice about it and know exactly what it is. And it’s, I’m sure men fall into this trap, too. But I think it’s definitely women is that we feel the need. And it’s taken years of coaching and therapy for me to work through is we feel the need to be the martyr. And if we’re not suffering, we’re not worthy. And you think about things like well, my grandparents didn’t have this, or my mom didn’t have this. So I don’t deserve this or like, a friend of mine had four kids at home with no childcare and no housekeeper. So why should I have one? You know, and you can apply this to literally anything? Absolutely. And it almost makes us have this really unhealthy trauma, bonding culture. Yeah, you know, like, everyone has to tell their word horror stories of how hard you know, just like it doesn’t have to be. And there’s a lot of guilt that comes with being happy and having an easy life. And why is that? But it’s a whole nother

Susan Crews
week that we can have another one or two or three episodes on that. But here’s what I’ll say to you, Molly. And I say it to all the listeners all the time and to our guests. Number one, you are beautiful. You are worthy. And you are a radiant soul sister.

Molly Cahill
Yeah. Yep. So yeah, just surround yourself with people who enjoy being happy. And it’s not about cutting out every stressful thing or putting blinders on and not knowing what’s going on in the world. But it’s about the resilience, not spiraling and knowing that there’s no guilt to be had if things are coming easy to you.

Susan Crews
That’s right, Molly. I love it. And I hope you have a fabulous day. Thank you Susan. That was a fun episode of the radiant soul sisters. Thank you for choosing to tune in. Be sure to join me next week when I shine the light on another beautiful woman. Till then I’m Susan cruise, your host and be sure to check out my website at Susan cruise co.com where you will find all the podcast episodes and resources for our community.